This is not good. This is not good at all. Its Saturday evening, Ant & Dec’s Saturday Night Takeaway has resumed on television but there is something missing. Oh my goodness me am I having a severe attack of the munchies and it is killing me. I am afraid to swear on here but *&^% it’s not good.
To make matters worse I am getting visions of a man dressed in a gorilla suit playing the drums along to Phil Collins In the Air Tonight…….. I can feel it coming in the air tonight…oh … I then change track and somehow end up on a scene from the Hangover where Mike Tyson knocks out…. I am sure you get the picture.
I found myself bolted to the sofa. I couldn’t move…my brain was saying CHOCOLATE…CADBURYS but my body was about to start a mass argument with brain, stomach and taste buds that would last far longer than any Mike Tyson punch and maybe longer than a whole boxing match. It was dreadful. I could feel the velvet texture of Dairy Milk in my mouth. Chocolate was there – and now an integral part of the event. One taste of chocolate (or even the thought alone) makes the mouth water and the emotional associations rush in. It brings back the multitude of fondly remembered feel-good experiences we didn’t want to end.
So a great-testing piece of chocolate inevitably makes us happy inside. Of course, it doesn’t hurt that chocolate contains a natural substance that’s reputed to stimulate the same reaction in the body as falling in love or even sex. That’s why, even at times when we’re feeling down, anything chocolate feels so comforting.
Chocolate is Meant to be Shared… huh ! no way sunshine..not in this house. It’s a bar each.
So I peeled back the wrapper, they even have an easy open wrapper now so you can get your fix even quicker. Minute specks and flakes fell off as I revealed the grid of creamy brown segments. My mouth was watering with anticipation..this was the first fix in five weeks. Crack ! The bar was broken, quite unevenly too. Now residing in manageable bite size chunks the were arranged in an orderly fashion on the now lifeless foil backed wrapper. This was mine ! Sod sharing.
As the velvet texture graced my tongue with its presence the feeling came across me like feeling in love for the first time. I could hear the words “Welcome back friends”.
It was then that I awoke.
The words “welcome back friends” were the voice of Ant & Dec on Saturday Night Takeaway and there wasnt a Dairy Milk in sight.
I went and got myself an apple !
Where is my skeleton? 